Ask Amile : Redskins & Raider Fan Talk PLUS...The Art of Tackling

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From the inbox

Q. Why are so many people writing off the Redskins so quickly? In my opinion their season is very unpredictable. Their defense looks very good on paper and has the potential to be great. Their offense has had reasonable upgrades at key positions, and they have great depth at tight end. As for the quarterback issue, I don't see a huge issue. Rex Grossman did lead a team to the Super Bowl and John Beck hasn't had a chance to prove anyone wrong or right, so it's wrong to write him off. Do you think that the Redskins have the potential to go .500 or have a wild card spot this year?

Robert from Leesburg, Va.

A. "Potential" is a dirty word in the NFL, and I think most of the doubt relating to the Redskins revolves around their QB situation because their run game has looked stellar thus far in the preseason. No matter who starts for the Skins, he clearly will be the least accomplished passer in a very tough division, and therein lies the problem. Although I think we know what Grossman is as a quarterback, I believe the jury is still out on Beck. I don't know how people can have such definitive opinions after four starts as a rookie for a horrendous Dolphins team. He might be terrible, or he could end up being great or something in between, but how does anyone know at this point? They don't. The Shanahans are staking their reputation on him, which means either way it will be very interesting.

Q. Do you think that tackling is a lost art in the NFL? It seems that so many players go for that "Big Hit" that there are far too many missed tackles. I'm not trying to take anything away from the RBs, WRs etc., breaking tackles, but defenders seem to look for the highlight reel hit or the "Ole!" arm-tackle."Your thoughts?

Pat from Indianapolis

A. I'm not surprised to get this email from Indy, given how poorly the Colts' defense has tackled thus far this preseason. As far as overall tackling, this is something that I hear all the time. Most people just accept it as fact, but I am not convinced. I'd love to see some sort of metrics that support the thesis that tackling is a lot worse now than it used to be. Sometimes I think it is kind of like the "when I was your age, I used to walk five miles to school uphill barefoot in the snow" thought process. There are plenty of players who are very sure tacklers. Maybe those who aren't shouldn't be on the field.

Q. As a Raider fan it is hard to become excited about this upcoming season, so is there anything that the Raider Nation and I should pay attention to in order to stay interested in our team?

Brian from Rubidoux, Calif.

A. I share your concern about the Raiders this year and am very disappointed by their offseason. The Raiders have an awesome fan base, and the league is more interesting when they are good. I fear they are going in the wrong direction this year. They won more than five games for the first time since 2002, going a respectable 8-8 last season, yet they fired their head coach and lost their best offensive player (Zach Miller), defensive player (Nnamdi Asomugha) and offensive lineman (Robert Gallery) in free agency. That's not good. Seems to me that with the exorbitant contracts that they gave to Michael Huff, Kamerion Wimbley and Stanford Routt, the Raiders paid the wrong guys. When you talk with other executives around the league, it always seems as though the Raiders are negotiating with themselves. No other team would have given contracts even close to the amount that the Raiders gave those three good but not elite players.

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ASK AMILE: My Man's Over-the-Top Sexual Appetite

I’ve been thinking long and hard about my current situation and I am stuck trying to figure out what’s right and wrong and I’m just hoping you can help me answer it. Although, from reading your other responses to people, I think we all know what’s right and wrong, it’s just doing what’s right, that’s the hard part.

So, I’ve known this guy for about four years – three of those years we been hooking up. Just within the past year it has gotten a little more serious to where we hang out about 4 to 5 times a week. He claims he doesn’t want a relationship but his recent actions say otherwise.

For instance, we hang out to just hang out, no sex involved. He sleeps over a few nights a week and he gets very jealous if I even talk about other guys. Just recently he told me he had a very deep secret. He told me that he’s had intercourse with another man. At first it seemed like it was just an experimental kind of thing, but then he admitted that he likes guys who are more on the feminine side and if he hooked up with a transgender it wouldn’t matter.  He also said at first that he was the giver not the taker and he sounded very stern about that. But, just recently, he has made comments that he wanted me to use a dildo on him and even buy a butt plug that we could share. This just totally caught me off guard. He did mention that the reason why he had a hard time letting go of his ex-girlfriend was because she accepted him for who he was. I’m guessing she got in on the action or she didn’t mind him having sex with another guy.

Now in the beginning of our relationship it was totally “Friends With Benefit” sort of thing, but as we started to hang out more and more I started to fall for him. Now with this situation I’m not sure what to do. I guess my question is…Is it ok for me to still fool around with a guy who is bisexual?  Honestly it makes me feel kind of dirty, but my feelings for him are so strong that it’s hard to end it now.  Please Gay Best Friend I need some guidance!!! – Confused Belle

Dear Ms. Belle,

I can’t do you and this letter. As a matter of fact, I really don’t want to do you and this letter. I mean, come on!! The Africans must have braided your hair a little too tight. Or, perhaps the wig you’re wearing is too tight around your dome.

He is GAY, GAY, GAY! There is no bi-sexual about it. He’s GAY!

Run, Run, Run Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf is going to devour you and spit you out if you stay. So, put on your red hi-top Reebok sneakers (the old school kind from back in the day) and jet as fast as you can. There is no having a relationship with him, not unless you don’t mind sharing him with men.

But, let’s first address the issue of him telling you that he does not want a relationship. I don’t care what a man’s actions are, if he says he doesn’t want to be in relationship then guess what? That means not with you or anyone! So, there should be no confusion on your part about this. HE DOES NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP.

And, then he drops the bomb on you and admits that he likes guys. Uhm, sweetheart, he has told you what and who he is into. HE’S GAY! He likes men. He said he likes effeminate men and if he hooked up with someone who is Transgender that it wouldn’t matter. GIRL, please, come on! What more do you need to know? You can’t be in that much denial. But, then again, if he was laying it on you, I am sure that your womanly instincts got confused with your sexual desires because you’re obviously whipped on this man’s ding dong. HE’S GAY! He’s into men!

This man has lead you to believe that because he was the giver and not the receiver that he is not gay. Ms. Honey, you’ve just lost all your womanly, and DIVA card carrying privileges. Every man who claims to be on the down-low, or bi-sexual will tell a woman he is not the receiver because in his mind, if he is the receiver then that somehow makes him the one who is gay because only gay men receive. Don’t believe it or that. Any man who is having sex with another man despite if he’s the giver or receiver is GAY! But, many men think if he is the giver then he maintains his manhood, and him penetrating or receiving oral doesn’t make him gay. Girl, BYE! You and he both need to miss me, don’t call, and don’t send a letter.

But, hold up! Stop the presses and push rewind. You said he made comments that he wanted you to use a dildo on him and even buy a butt plug that you could share. Click! That’s me hanging up the phone and dismissing you.

Be aware of what your situation is... and RUN LIKE HELL!

-AW 

If you would like to submit your questions to Amile please submit them to the appropriate link located in the CONTACT page of this site. ALL submitted questions are reviewed. Only questions pertaining to contents of the blog (SPORTS, SEX /PERSONAL ADVICE) will only be selected for review. Amile Waters was an OB/GYN nurse for US Navy and is currently going to UCLA Med School to persue her Doctorate. All sexual advice is all textbook and from her experience as a nurse in such field and/or personal experience.

A Special Ask Amile: Threesomes & Guys Taking things slow?? (Video Blog Inside)

OK so I am here on my business vaca and while having a little time to myself, decided to answer 2 "Ask Amile" questions... via Ustream!!! I know its been a while since doing this but if you noticed.... yes my boobs are bigger.... and no its not surgery... Mother Nature just smacked them around and they swelled.

Happy Endings,
Amile W.

Q #1: Should I discuss a threesome with my guy?





Q #2: My guys wants to take things slow.. Is he really into me??